Musician, writer, artist, gardener, Jane-of-all-trades.
I keep astonishingly busy with a wide variety of things and this blog may seem random in consequence. Expect Mass Effect fanfic (including the ongoing saga of pilot-lovin' Rhi Shepard), thoughts on disability, politics, and a liberal helping of goats. Especially baby goats.
okay so i actually have a headcanon drunken vetinari (don’t you judge me)
but basically i see him staying entirely the same except for blown out pupils, just completely composed and spotting a tiny, slightly self-satisfied smile that he has when he’s pleased
except he turns into a fucking kleptomaniac
shows up in the party suddenly wearing a hat and going like ‘i stole this hat from someone. i like this hat.’
taking people’s shoes and building an impressive little pyramid out of them in some empty room
not actually sleeping with women but doing this drawn out speech where he convinces them that they are wonderful and that they should marry him and the ladies usually don’t know whether to laugh or say yes
and then he steals their shoes
(i’m talking about younger vetinari mostly i think the older version has calmed down on the proposing)
getting into fights except he subjugates his fighting partners and sits on them and shushes them and pets their face for a while (and steals their shoes)
if he’s REALLY really drunk he tries to blend into his background and succeeds only marginally and suddenly people can spot him standing still, half behind a curtain with a barely controlled tiny laugh and a weird hat (it’s okay tho, because everyone’s drunk at that point)
The number of drunken wizards’ hats he could acquire, tho’.
#just imagine all the blustering wizards slowly being de-hatted through the course of the night
I am so very here for Vetinari slowly and steadily acquiring a tower of wizard hats over the evening. He wears all of them at once.
WELL YOU JUST MADE THIS POST 100 % BETTER
The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money.
Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boots Vimes always bought, and wore until the soles were so thin that he could tell where he was in Ankh-Morpork on a foggy night by the feel of the cobbles.
But the thing was that good boots lasted for years and years. A man who could afford fifty dollars had a pair of boots that’d still be keeping his feet dry in ten years’ time, while the poor man who could only afford cheap boots would have spent a hundred dollars on boots in the same time and would still have wet feet.
This was the Captain Samuel Vimes ‘Boots’ theory of socioeconomic unfairness.
Terry Pratchett, “Men At Arms”
This is one of the best breakdowns I’ve ever seen of how expensive it is to be poor. (via slephoto)
this is true on so many levels
I always think about the money my parents have spent fixing up our house or various used cars over the years
Omg the sheer amounts of money I’ve had to pour into the cheap piece of shit car I have. So absolutely true.
There’s a reason my cat is named Terry Pratchett